1. Be grateful for your spouse

Being thankful for your spouse involves recognizing and appreciating their unique qualities, actions, and the overall positive impact they have on your life. This can be done through specific expressions of gratitude, active listening, and recognizing their character and contributions. 

In essence, being thankful for your spouse is about actively noticing, appreciating, and expressing your gratitude for their presence, their actions, and the positive impact they have on your life and the marriage you share. 

2. Practice communication

Practicing biblical communication with your spouse involves prioritizing listening, speaking with kindness and truth, and seeking God’s wisdom in your interactions. It’s about creating a space where each partner feels heard, respected, and valued, reflecting God’s love and character in your marriage. 

Set aside dedicated time to talk, even if it’s just for a few minutes each day. Find ways to meet each other’s needs and desires, even when you disagree. Don’t hold onto grudges or resentments, but instead choose to forgive and move forward. If you are struggling with communication, consider seeking advice from a counselor or trusted friend. Here are some specific examples:

• Pay full attention to your spouse, making eye contact, and avoiding interruptions or distractions. 
• Seek to understand: Go beyond the surface of what’s being said and try to understand your spouse’s feelings, perspective, and needs. 
• Nonverbal communication: Pay attention to body language and tone, as they can convey as much as or even more than words. 
• Avoid negativity and harsh language: Be mindful of the power of words, choosing to speak words of life, encouragement, and love. 
• Be truthful: Avoid dishonesty, lies, or exaggerations, as these can erode trust. 
• AND MOST IMPORTANTLY: Use “I” statements! Express your feelings and needs without placing blame on your spouse. “I feel…” or “What I hear you saying is…”

3. Be intimate

We can understand this best by reading and following the apostle Paul’s teaching in 1 Corinthians 7:2–5:

“Each man should have sexual relations with his own wife, and each woman with her own husband. The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband.

“In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife. Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.”

There is no hint of such strictness or severity in Paul’s teaching to married couples. They are to simply fulfill their marital duty through engaging in sexual activity together. This sexual activity is to be consistent unless both parties agree to a time of abstinence for prayer.

4. Forgive

Forgiveness in marriage, as taught in scripture, is a conscious choice to release a spouse from the debt owed due to an offense, not a feeling. It’s about acknowledging and addressing the wrong, then choosing to let go and release it, not about justifying or ignoring the harm. Scripture emphasizes forgiving as we have been forgiven by God, and it’s a crucial element in maintaining a healthy marriage. 

5. Be teachable

To gain experience in truth you must long to be teachable, or you can despise correction and remain uneducated and ignorant. If your heart is right, favor flows from the Lord, but a devious heart invites his condemnation. You can’t expect to be accomplished in this by doing what’s wrong.